05 Jun LAST ACTION HERO RE-REVIEW

This is part of my ‘Re-Review’ series, where I revisit a movie that I haven’t seen in several years to evaluate if my opinion has changed with time.

Old Opinion: The movie that broke my devotion to Arnold Schwarzenegger films

New Opinion: Better than I remember, but still better in concept than execution

Up until 1993, I watched every Schwarzenegger film I could find: Predator, Total Recall, Terminator 2…Arnold could do no wrong. And in 1993, I was old enough to go to the theater by myself and see Last Action Hero. Plus, it was directed by John McTiernan, who made the three of the greatest action films back-to-back: Predator, Die Hard, and The Hunt for Red October. LAH’s pedigree looked perfect, and the concept of a kid getting the chance to enter into a movie seemed like my kind of cinematic fantasy.

Unfortunately, LAH was a conceptual winner wrapped in a colossal disappointment. And in my opinion, the problems were legion. The main actor, Austin O’Brian, was not given very good direction, and his performance is tonally all over the place. However, the entire movie is tonally schizophrenic, veering from surprisingly dark to slapstick comedy in the blink of an eye, so it is hardly O’Brian’s fault.

When O’Brian’s Danny is inside the movie, it is fun to see how many action movie cliches are portrayed and explained in absurd ways, and it’s also touching to see Arnold’s Jack Slater slowly realize the implications of being a character in a series of ridiculous action movies. These are solid touchpoints in the film, and I will always claim that Schwarzenegger’s turn as Hamlet is my favorite version of Hamlet ever, showing up as a trailer within the movie.

But when the film transition back to the real world, and the movie characters learn how reality differs from the fantasy world they come from, it seems that the filmmaker’s script, imagination, and budget all died, as a darker, more depressing tone takes over. The climactic fight is pretty trash. And throughout all of this, Danny is subject to the failings of the script, making choices and learning about the film he finds himself trapped in at such a slow rate that you wonder if he ever paid attention to any of the films he’s apparently watched. None of his choices match what a normal person in the same situation would choose, and that’s where I disconnected.

I think that another failing is that Jack Slater IV, the movie Danny finds himself inside, is really, really stupid and devoid of any logic or consistency. I realize the irony, having noted that I loved Arnold movies myself, but Jack Slater IV just seems apocalyptically terrible and that ultimately mirrors the audience experience with LAH. The movie-within-a-movie trope is more perfectly realized in Tropic Thunder, which is superior in every way.

By his own admission, LAH marked a major turn in Arnold’s career. Although he made True Lies the next year (one of his best action movies), his career never recovered from the failure of LAH.

While the idea of a movie about the power to enter movies sounds great, the execution in LAH was abysmal, and aside from Arnold’s 30-second turn as Hamlet, I doubt I’ll revisit this movie again.

Pros:

• Arnold’s self-awareness of his own reputation as a giant action hero is genuinely funny
• The metal soundtrack is surprisingly perfect for the movie
• The idea of the film is far superior to the execution, and the mere possibilities the movie suggests are worth a viewing

Cons:

• Terrible script
• Tonally inconsistent
• Stupid, not-clever-in-any-way humor
• Awful, cheap climax

Rating: 2/5
Last Action Hero is an example of squandered potential that rivals any movie you’ll ever see.

Review by Jim Washburn